Therapy (7) {Coffee Break}

Every therapy session for six weeks has been emotionally harrowing for me. I've had to spend the week in between just recovering. It's been battle every time I walked through the doors and sat on that couch. Triumph after triumph I've left that office feeling weary, bruised, and shaken. Last week, if you'll remember, I took a trip back in time. The battle fought last week was one of epic proportions and tremendous outcome. I spent every day and night afterward just slowly reviving my strength and letting God continue to wash the new healing over and through me. By the time I walked back that office and sat down on that couch yesterday, I was only just starting to perk back up and feel a bit of energy. I didn't know how I'd be able to handle another session but I trust M.T. What I came away with from my seventh therapy session that I want to pass along to all of you is break time. Some things take more out if us than others and therefore require more rehabilitation time. M.T. wanted me to just talk to her. She didn't guide the subject or project a goal; she listened. We actually laughed a few times. It was like sitting and having coffee with a good friend. When is the last time you did that? It's a therapy all it's own. M.T. did respond to each subject I talked about. Her responses were positive, complimentary, encouraging, and uplifting. And let's remember what I've said before...M.T. is no joke. She doesn't "small talk," or schmooze, or tell you what you want to hear. When she makes uplifting comments, they are solid and full of truth. It was an hour of spiritual massage. My emotions took a deep breath. It was exactly what I needed. Please don't think we weren't productive though! We were! At the end of the session, as we were winding up our conversation, I realized I was not tired, I had not cried, but most importantly, I was thinking so clearly! The trauma I endured had its part in molding me into who I've been. Last week, we crumbled some of that and began rebuilding me. I'm like a choose-your-own-adventure story. I've reached the end of this chapter and I don't like where it's going. So, I'm going back to the beginning and taking a different path. It's the long-wished-for do-over! When I drove away from therapy session number seven, I felt an excitement building within myself. There was a life choice I could make right now that would change my course forever...for the better. I've been planning on going back to school in the Fall. And NOW I know exactly what my major will be. What I've always wanted to be but thought I wasn't smart enough. I was too scared to follow my dream before. But that fear is gone and only joy and determination is left in its place. I know without a doubt this is what I'm supposed to do with my life. And now I'm ready. You can probably guess. The point is to allow yourselves more healing time when necessary. Beating yourself to the point where you have to heal from your healing will be counter-productive. And don't underestimate a simple break in the action. That break may be just the mind-clearing moment that will change your life.