Moving Away...

I am terrible at keeping in touch. I don't like talking on the phone. I don't take time to write letters. I do email but it's sporadic. If not for FaceBook, I probably wouldn't share and converse at all. I have a friend that is the exact same way. We live in two different states and see each other very rarely. When we do see each other, it's like we've been together always. When we're apart we don't think to touch base with each other. She knows I love her. I know she loves me. We know we'll see each other later and talk and be best friends for that five minutes. That's what kind of friend I am.

I'm the same with most of my family as well. I pray for them. I think about them. I just rarely reach out to them. My daily life is consumed with the what's-right-in-front-of-me stuff and it takes conscious effort to actually make contact with them. I always enjoy talking with them. It's not a dread. My family is a source of joy for me and there's not one single relative I'd not die for. When I'm talking with one of them, it's like we've always lived right next to each other and we have nothing to do all day but visit. But, when we're apart, I don't think to reach out to them. They know I love them. I know they love me. We know we will see each other soon and that love will be shown with hugs and visits.

When someone I do live close to moves away...or I move away from them...I know I will miss them, but I also know myself. I know I won't call or write. I am honest with them about this and I say, "You just need to know that I love you. I am always here. We'll see each other again some day!" I think of them and miss them, but I'm not sad because when we're together again, it's so much fun to catch each other up on our lives!

So. Why is it, when someone I love dies, I grieve and grieve and grieve and wish they were here? They've simply moved away. I didn't call or write when they were here. They know I love them. I know they love me. We know we'll see each other again and talk and visit and catch each other up. Why is it harder? They are not gone forever. They're in a different place, but with the promise of reconnection. Grieving feels like I've lost them forever. A certain amount of grief is healthy; but continual pining is an insult to my faith in eternity. If I truly believe in the afterlife, why would I go on and on about missing them?

I'll see them again. And we'll have so much time to visit. No more grief. Just togetherness.